Saturday, August 18, 2007


How To Behave Inside The Divorce Courtroom

How you behave in the courtroom during your divorce will have an impact on how your case is decided. Make sure to stay calm and in control at all times in the courtroom. Let your lawyer take the lead. Keep your mouth shut. Your attorney speaks for you here, and you should remain silent unless your attorney, or the judge, directs you to speak. When the judge speaks, pay attention. He is the one who decides things, so he is the most important person there. Don’t whisper in your attorney’s ear. If you do whisper, remember that sometimes the microphones at the table are very sensitive, and what you say may be recorded by the courtroom audiotape, and heard by the Court Reporter, even if nobody else hears you.
You may take notes while the judge is speaking, and if you need to you may show these to your attorney, but wait until the judge has finished speaking. This won’t be easy. At times you’ll feel ready to burst. At times you’ll feel angry, and there will be moments when you’ll want to cry. Someone may say something that begs for sarcastic reaction. Pretend you don’t hear. If your attorney is saying something that’s incorrect, or if you feel he or she needs clarification on a point, that’s what your notepad is for. Use it and use it directly.

To the judge you want to look sympathetic, yet intelligent, confident, and secure. Do not twirl your hair, play with your keys, or fix your makeup. Sit upright, and pay attention to every word that is being said. Your future is at stake. Do not look at your ex or his attorney. If your ex takes the stand, remain calm. This may be the most difficult thing for you. He may lie. He may twist every situation. At the very least he will have a view of the situation that is totally opposed to yours. That’s why you are here. Don’t lash out. Don’t lose your temper. Outbursts are not allowed in the courtroom. You must remain composed at all times. And above all, do not make funny faces or expressions of disbelief. Even if they are genuine, the judge may think you are play-acting, and won’t appreciate it. Your future, and that of your children, depends on how you control your behavior in the courtroom.

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