Monday, September 15, 2008

Feeling Down About Your Divorce? ...

Divorce is often a very negative experience that can overwhelm you and take over your life. Day after day your think about your ex, the divorce and grieve the loss of your marriage. Add in feelings of anger, betrayal and shock that your marriage is over and you have a recipe for long term depression.

When thoughts of the divorce consume you, you need to try and get some emotional relief. The more you dwell on the divorce and your ex, the more angry and hurt you feel. Just because the marriage has ended it does not mean that your life has ended too. It may feel that way at times and that is normal, but all too often a divorce saps the energy from you and leaves you with feelings of hopelessness and despair.

You need to move your thoughts away from the divorce and replace them with thoughts that feel better. The key is to catch yourself in a negative thought before it spirals out of control. As soon as you start thinking about what a rotten ex you have or how unfair your divorce is, that is your cue to stop and turn your thoughts around. Obviously you are not going to be able to suddenly think positively about the situation, but you can distract yourself by doing things that make you happy.

Start by making a list of the 10 things you enjoy doing most. Maybe you have a particular hobby you enjoy, love to read or like to take walks on the beach. Whatever it is, go out and do it. By forcing yourself to get out of the house and stop the negative chatter in your mind, you will start attracting better thoughts and circumstances into your life. Little by little, the pain you feel about your divorce will start to fade into the background and then one day you will find yourself not thinking about your ex or the divorce at all.

1 comment:

mistyeyed said...

Waht a great article. Divorce is so hard, especially for the family. I was a child of divorce and know what it feels like.

I actually have a friend whose going through a divoce. I guess the one good thing is that it's uncontested. They're getting their paperwork done through Joint

Thank you again for the great blog.