Friday, October 05, 2007

Slinging Mud In A Divorce: Should You Go There?

The Denise Richards-Charlie Sheen divorce/custody battle has become dirtier than ever, with Ms.Richards submitting some shocking allegations to the court about Mr.Sheen. Everything from vicious emails to alleged pornography use by Mr. Sheen, are now public knowledge. (Read more here)

Sadly, vicious divorce battles where both parties reveal horrible things about each are not limited to high profile celebrities. Which leads us to the question, is anything off limits when it comes to winning a divorce or custody battle? Or should couples do whatever it takes to triumph, even if it includes humiliating the father or mother of your children?

It all depends on your motive. If you are seeking to destroy your ex in court purely to get revenge, then you will have to deal with the fact that your children will someday be privileged to the information you are exposing. If however, the allegations are true and you feel your children may be affected negatively by your ex's behavior, you need to report that information to the court. Of course it depends on the severity of the allegations, if your spouse does drugs or or engages in other dangerous behavior you must protect yourself and your children by reporting it. However, if your ex is a loving parent and has an embarrassing habit that does not in any way affect the children, revealing that information can only be damaging to your kids.

If you are tempted to expose your ex in court ask yourself this question: Am I doing this to ensure the well being of myself or my children? Or am I so hurt and angry at my ex that I want him to suffer? If the latter is true, take a step back and get in touch with your feelings before taking harmful actions based on revenge.

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