Thursday, March 27, 2008



Are Divorced Women Angry, Desperate and Miserable?...

Of course not! But sadly there are some stereotypes out there about female divorcees. We are often cast as angry, bitter women desperate for sex. The term "Cougars" is now being thrown around to describe older women supposedly hunting down young men half their age.

Funny how I have not heard any derogatory terms used to coin divorced men. When a man gets divorced and starts dating a girl young enough to be his daughter, no one seems to notice.

I recently received an email about my book Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce from a woman. Here is what she wrote: "Is there really a secret to a successful divorce? All the single women that I know are miserably single from what they tell me and almost 100% cannot find another man because they become too picky about the type of man that they are looking for."

I coach woman who are going through a divorce and most of the women I speak to are not "miserably single". In fact, many are relieved to be free from a unhappy marriage and excited about what the future holds. Although there may be some women who cannot get past their divorces and choose not to move on, they are the minority.

I think this kind of thinking is a great disservice to women . Most divorced women are raising kids, holding down full time jobs and trying to squeeze in a social life. Believe me, they have no time to be hanging out every weekend in nightclubs picking up young men in their 20's.

I think the stereotypes and myths about divorced women may stem from some people's inability to accept that women today can survive without a man. No longer are we destined to marry and stay in a miserable marriage, giving up our self worth. We can stand on our own, be successful and choose whether or not we want a man in our lives.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Amazing blog, where did you learn to build a blog lik this?

I am not sure if there is such a thing as a successful divorce. A divorce is very much like a tornado that wrecks individuals lives. I am a victum of divorce along with my three children. It happend 11 years ago and all of us are still trying to work through the pile of rubble that the twister caused in our lives. Inlaws, grandparents, sisters, brothers, aunts,uncles and many others have been effected in extreem negative ways because of the horrible catagory F5 that destroyed many relationships. All taht is left is a bunch of pieces to try to assemle back together.

http://www.divorcefire.com

Christina Rowe said...

Thanks! I taught myself how to blog, it is very easy using the blogger format.
You are right on. Divorce is like a Tornado ripping apart your life. It takes time to clean up the mess, but eventually, with time, things get better, although never the same.