Children Grieve During Divorce Too

While experiencing a divorce, couples go through a grieving process. The loss of their marriage, the death of their dreams and hopes for the future, come crashing down on them in waves, much like the death of a loved one. What we sometimes forget is that children experience these emotions too, but differently than adults.

You may not even recognize that your child is grieving the loss of your marriage. Just like with depression, children often do not exhibit the "classic" symptoms we associate with grief and depression. An adult may become listless, sad and lose interest in activites while a child may act out in anger against siblings and friends, spend excessive time on the computer and video games and do poorly in school in reaction to a divorce.

Fortunately there are resources and help for children experiencing a loss. Rainbows, a non profit organization, is devoted to helping children through times of divorce, death, and crisis. Their services are free of charge and there are chapters worldwide. The organization was founded by Suzy Yehl Marta, a divorced mother of three boys, who gave up the security of her three jobs to do something she knew in her heart had to be done for children grieving over the loss of a parent through death, divorce, separation or a painful transition. Suzy is also the author of

Healing the Hurt, Restoring the Hope:How to Guide Children and Teens Through Times of Divorce, Death, and Crisis With the Rainbows Approach

Suzy says "A child’s grieving process is different from that of adults. The Rainbows program helps adults understand how children perceive loss and how to help them get beyond it with a unique approach of play-based activities. Drawing upon over two decades of experience with small groups, this guide shows how to keep misperceptions and sadness from permanently affecting children."

Rainbow is an excellent, free resource for divorcing parents looking for a way to help their children cope with divorce. If you would like to find out more information about Rainbows and find a chapter near you, visit http://www.rainbows.org/