Why Both Men and Women Cheat....

This Friday night, Christine Brinkley's cheating ex- husband, Peter Cook is being interviewed by Barbara Walters on ABC. In sneak previews, Cook blames Brinkley for his affair, saying he did not get attention or "thank yous" for all of his efforts and felt like he was living with his sister.

This is the typical excuse for both men and women who cheat. It is just so much easier to blame your spouse than to take responsibility for your actions. However, there may be some truth here as to why a person would be tempted to cheat. Many have cited the same reason Cook has. Lack of attention, affection and feeling unappreciated. Of course this is not a valid reason to cheat. These are reasons to ask your spouse to attend martial counseling and if all else fails, ask for a divorce. Most people really do not want to get a divorce., but instead of letting their spouses know how they are feeling, they look outside of the marriage for excitement, fulfillment and love.

If your ex cheated on you it is important not to blame yourself. But the affair is almost always a symptom of a failing marriage. If you find that your spouse is acting depressed, withdrawn or complaining of lack of affection, those are red flags. Martial counseling and opening up the lines if communication may prevent an affair and save your marriage.

Christie Brinkley's Nasty Divorce Battle Continues...

I have been following the Christie Brinkley-Peter Cook divorce trial in the news over the last few days . This is a perfect example of how a divorce can spiral out of control ,like a tornado, damaging everyone in it's path.

The trial started on Wednesday with shocking testimony and repulsive, graphic details of Peter Cook's affair with a teenage and expensive porn habit. Yesterday the trial continued with Christie Brinkley on the stand, explaining how her life was shattered when she found out about her husband's affair.

At issue in this divorce trial is custody of the couple's two children and three properties bought by Ms. Brinkley, even though they have a pre-nup.

Here are some of the gory details, in case you have not been following the news:

Peter cook had an affair with an 18 year old who he hired because she was "beautiful" paying her $20,00 to type magazine articles into his company's website. He admits to leaving money for her in various location and having sex with her at two of Christie Brinkley's homes.

He also went on to pay his mistress $300,000 to keep quiet. Mr. Cook also admits to surfing porn and swinger websites and performing lewd acts in front of a web cam. He supposedly spent $3,000 a month on his porn habit. (Note: Peter Cook married Christie Brinkely with very little of his own money and few assets. Christie Brinkely paid the bills and supported their lavish lifestyle).

His step-daughter, Alexa Ray Joel, testified that he once pushed her head into a bucket of water after her shower leaked.

The biggest insult is that Peter Cook actually had the nerve to accuse his wife of being vengeful and angry and a "good actress". I think she has every reason to feel angry. Her husband, cheated, squandered her money and has added insult to injury by suing her for sole custody for their children.

Mr. Cook's lawyer feels that it has been 2 years and she should be over it by now. Sorry, but it does not work that way. The deep pain inflicted on a person whose spouse has cheated can take years to heal. Should she be using the trial to punish her husband? No. She needs to time to grieve the loss of her marriage and go through the many stages of grief. I don't think she is trying to get revenge here, only to protect her assets and retain custody of the children.

Should this trial be open to the public? I still think that was a mistake. The trial could of went on without everyone in the world knowing the graphic details. I can only imagine the how difficult this must be for their kids, having to hear the horrible details of their father's sexual habits and adultery.

If you are going through a divorce, let this divorce trial serve as an example of how ugly and nasty going to trial can get. Do everything possible to settle your divorce. That may mean giving up some things in order to avoid the pain a trial can bring.

Sometimes though, a trial becomes the only way to settle a divorce, especially when the issue is not primarily money, but custody of the children. In this case, both of these parents love their kids, and even though Peter Cook is not a good husband, it does not necessarily make him a bad father. He obviously has a problem and needs help. Unless there is physical or emotional abuse and evidence of one parent being a danger to the children, custody arrangements can be worked out.

In the end, Compromise is key. No one is happy with their divorce settlement and like I have said so many times before, the lawyers are the only true winners when a divorce battle drags on.

Celebrity Divorces In the News This Week....

This was a busy week for divorcing celebrities. Here is a run down:

Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook: Their divorce trial is set to begin next week. Meanwhile, Christie has subpoenaed the 19 year old girl her ex-husband had an affair with to testify in court.

Kimora Lee Simmons and Russell Simmons: Looks like this is an amicable divorce, with Russell agreeing to pay $40,000 a month in child support.

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline: Britney gets overnight visits with the boys but they are still unable to settle custody issues in mediation. Trial is set for later this summer

Hulk and Linda Hogan: Hulk confesses he still loves Linda even though they are getting divorced. Linda is still dating the 19 year old friend of her daughter, Brooke. Brooke is no longer speaking to her mom.

Madonna and Guy Ritchie: Rumored to be getting a divorce. Madonna supposedly met with Paul McCartney's pitbull of a divorce attorney. Amazingly, rumors are that there is no pre-nup and Guy could get half of Madonna's 600 million fortune.

Should Divorce Trials Be Kept Private?

A N.Y. Court has granted model Christie Brinkley's request to keep her divorce trial with husband Peter Cook public . Her ex had requested the proceedings be made private to protect their two children. He was caught cheating on the former supermodel with a 19 year old assistant and did not want the public to have access to the dirty laundry that will inevitably be aired during this divorce trial.

I think this divorce trial should be kept private, although not to protect Mr. Cook's reputation. The issue here is their two children. Now that the trial is going to be open to the public, it means that the press will be privy to everything. Naturally they will report on all of the allegations, including ones of porn addiction and other deviant behavior by their father. These kids may be teased at school and unfortunately will be able to read about their parent's divorce on the Internet and see it on T.V.

Although you wan to be truthful with your kids during a divorce, you also want to spare them the ugly details. Keeping a divorce trial private, especially for celebrities, also protects the children from hearing things that they may not be able to comprehend at a young age. I am sure Christie Brinkley feels hurt and angry and wants to make her ex suffer by humiliating and embarrassing him. After what he has done, he deserves it. But her kids do not. By dragging him through the mud, she is going to take the kids along for the ride.

The 5 Worst Celebrity Husbands And Fathers...

1. Hulk Hogan-Sneaky Hulk Hogan is being accused of trying to trying to trick his wife, Linda, into signing a post-nuptial agreement and hiding millions that were made in a real estate transaction. He also has said that his"ex-wife can support herself". Not very nice considering he was married to his wife for over 20 years, while she stayed at home with the kids so he could advance his wrestling career.

2. Eddie Murphy- Eddie has separated from his new "wife"Tracey Edmonds, after only 2 weeks of marriage. Apparently their marriage was not legal. Let's also not forget how Eddie denied he was the father of Spice Girl, Melanie Brown's baby and reportedly has never met his child, even after a paternity test proved he was the baby girl's father. What a shame that the star of "Daddy Daycare" is a deadbeat dad.

3. Charlie Sheen. This insensitive jerk allegedly emailed his ex-wife, Denise Richards the following message:"You are a pig. A sad, jobless pig who is sad and talentless and, um, oh yeah, sad and jobless and evil and a bad mom, so go [expletive] yourself, sad, jobless pig." What a nice guy. No wonder he has court ordered, supervised visits with his two young daughters.

4. Alec Baldwin- Who can forgot Alec's vicious rant on his 11 year old daughter's cell phone last summer. If he can call his daughter a ""a thoughtless, rude little pig" you can only imagine the emotional abuse he might of inflicted on Kim Basinger while they were married.

5.Peter Cook- Ex-husband of Christie Brinkley. This man was married to one of the most beautiful women in the world and cheated on her with his teen assistant. What was he thinking? It is unsettling to think that a man in his mid forties would have an affair with a 19 year old, especially when his own step daughter, Alexa Joel, was around the same age.