Why a "Rebound" Relationship Can Be Good for You...

You have most likely have heard the warnings about the "rebound" man or woman. This is the first person you have a relationship with after your divorce. The typical advice is to take it slow and not get too attached because rebound relationships often do not last.

That may be true and the advice to be careful so that you do not suffer a double blow-first a divorce and then a failed relationship-is sound. But there are benefits to having a rebound relationship after your divorce.

One benefit is the distraction the new relationship provides. You may be still reeling from your divorce and having many issues lingering. Your new relationship provides you with excitement, fun and the thrill of being in love again. These positive emotions can help keep your mind off of the divorce and bring back some joy in your life again.

Another benefit is a boost to your self esteem. If your ex was emotionally abusive or did not pay attention to you and put you down often, having a new lover who showers you with attention and compliments can do wonders for your self esteem. You start believing that you are an attractive again and someone who can be loved.

So go ahead and enjoy your new relationship after your divorce. But understand that you may not be emotionally ready for a serious, committed relationship so soon after your divorce. If you have not resolved the issues from your marriage and gone through the grieving process, you could be setting yourself up for another failed relationship. The key is to keep your new relationship light and fun and enjoy it for what it is worth. Be in the moment and take it one step at a time without expectations, while giving yourself the time you need to recover fully from your divorce.

Rebound Marriages After a Divorce...

Sara Evans, country singer and former Dancing with the Stars contestant, revealed that she is engaged, just six short months after a nasty divorce battle. Even more shocking is the news that French President Nicolas Sarkozy , remarried model Carla Bruni, shortly after he divorced his wife of 11 years. His ex-wife also remarried in NYC over the weekend, only four months after their divorce was finalized.

What is going on with the trend of marrying again on the rebound shortly after a divorce? I have been divorced for almost 3 years and still cannot even imagine getting married again yet. I just don't get it.

After a divorce you need time to recover emotionally. Jumping into a new relationship too soon can be disastrous. What usually happens is that a person will find that the problems he or she had with their first partner are also in the new relationship. Until you have taken the time to reflect and analyze your marriage, the good, the bad and the ugly and take some responsibility for the divorce, you will just bring the same issues and problems from one relationship to another, never resolving them.

The time period after a divorce can be a great time to spend on yourself, learning to enjoy your own company ans rediscovering what makes you happy. After a divorce you need time to be single again before finding a new love. If you are contemplating a new romance shortly after a divorce, slow down and take some time out before committing too soon.