How to Cope with Being Divorced and Single on Valentine's Day...

Well it's that time of year again. The stores are flooded with hearts, chocolates and corny greeting cards. Reminders are everywhere that the "day of love" is fast approaching. There is no escaping Valentine's Day. If you are divorced and not dating anyone special this can be a particularly painful time.

You may feel lonely and unloved and wonder if you will ever meet that someone special again. Many people dread being single this time of year. It can trigger emotions and memories of the past when you were married and in love. Now, single and alone, you may feel like you have nothing to look forward to this Valentine's Day.

But there are some ways to not only get through Valentine's day while being single, but actually enjoy it. One way is to call up your single friends and plan a night out on the town. Since you are all in the same situation, why not go out and have a fun night out? If you rather stay home with the kids, have your own Valentine's day party. Bake some red cupcakes, put some red food coloring in ginger ale for the kids and buy some pink champagne for yourself. Celebrate all of the love you have in your life, the love you feel for your children, parents, pets and friends.

Do anything that makes you feel happy and appreciative. Try not to dwell on what is missing in your life this Valentine's Day and instead focus on what you already have. With a positive attitude and a little planning, you may find yourself actually looking forward to Valentine's Day this year.

Click here to read a free chapter of Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce...

How To Be Your Own Valentine This Year...

With Valentine's Day just around the corner, you may be feeling a little
down. After all this holiday of "love" is a painful reminder of love gone
wrong, especially if you are recently single. There has been much written
about how to survive this dreaded holiday, but here is a relatively new concept: Why not be your own Valentine this year?

Okay, I know it sounds corny. But think about it, if you don't love and accept
yourself for who you are, can you really accept others to do the same?

The experience of divorce has most definitely changed you and forced you to grow and mature in ways you never thought possible. Can you learn from the pain of divorce and use the lessons it has taught to look inward and starting respecting and loving yourself?

Instead of beating yourself up, thinking negative thoughts and indulging in self-blame,
start thinking about all of your good qualities. I know it is not easy, we are conditioned
to play down our strengths and highlight our weaknesses. But try this. Take a rubber band
and for the next several days wear it on your wrist. Every time you have a negative
thought, pull the rubber band and give yourself a zap. It will literally "snap" you out of your self-defeating thoughts.

Next, make a list of all of your positive attributes. Read them every night before you go to bed. Then finally, on Valentine's Day, buy yourself a present. A big box of chocolate and some champagne, a dozen roses, or a stuffed teddy bear.

Become your own best friend and start enjoying being by yourself. A funny thing
may happen. Because like attracts like, once you start loving yourself and treating yourself well, you may attract someone who does the same. Who knows, you might just have that special someone to spend next Valentine’s Day with.