Invite miracles into your life today!

Today, May 1st, 2007, I'm coming to your home and bringing a large number of the greatest masters of our time with me.

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That's right!Along with me, you will find Neale Donald Walsch, Deepak Chopra, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Marianne Williamson, Gregg Braden, Debbie Ford, James Twyman, Louise Hay, Bob Proctor and many others.Our intention is to share with you the wisdom of our most profound teachings without asking for anything in return except that you advance in your own future growth by investing in the amazing new book Your Destiny Switch by Peggy McColl.

Neale Donald Walsch wrote the Foreword for this book and in it he said: "This may be the most important book you have ever read. I'm grateful to Peggy McColl for having written it.

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My friend, international author and renowned success coach Peggy McColl, has written Your Destiny Switch, a life-changing book that reveals the unlimited force of your feelings, the real powerhouse of your destiny creation.In this unprecedented offer Peggy not only provides you with the elusive secret ingredient for mastering your life, she also gives you many valuable gifts from the acclaimed masters of attraction. http://promos.hayhouse.com/promos/mccoll/050107email/

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Peggy provides brilliant techniques, such as "illuminators" which demonstrate how your thoughts and feelings often unconsciously impact your life, and switching, an empowering process that guides you step-by-step to new emotional habits to create a life of mastery filled with joy and abundance.Click below to find all of the great details. You will also find my gift along with those of many of the greatest experts in the world. Please invest in your destiny today and get yourself a copy of YOUR DESTINY SWITCH.

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I wanted to tell you about a woman I met last week at a seminar,in which she was profiled as a bestselling author of her book that just launched called “31 Days to Millionaire Marketing Miracles’,and the reason I want to talk to you about her, is because she went through a violent marriage, and brutal divorce, but bounced back to millionaire status, and she wants you to do that too.
Tracy has 2 stories, the one she lets other people read,and the one she usually keeps buried under the most embarrassing and devastating time of her life. She shared both stories with me,and I know by hearing them you will know that there is a better life just around the corner.
Here is what everyone knows - Tracy Repchuk is the CEO of4 successful companies, the first she started in 1985 at the age of 19. She is a Canadian Entrepreneur of the Year and Chamber of Commerce Business Woman of the Year nominee,and corporate, product and volunteer award recipient. This is her second book - her first "The Poetry of Business" was a huge success, and she has been involved with computers for over 22 years.
This is the side very few people know about - She started her first company while she was still in college at the age of 19, in 1985. Together with her college boyfriend, they planned our life together. She had made the big leagues by time she was 22 years old, driving her BMW, buying properties, extravagant vacations, Mercedes, the works.And then, she got engaged, but it's not what you're thinking,because 2 weeks before the wedding, he called it off. He was with someone else, and she had gotten pregnant, and he was going to marry her. She worked side-by-side through agony and heart ache,and watched him with her, while she still loved him. But the pain did not stop there. She did something foolish, and that was start to see someone who was clearly not right for her.And then yes, in June of 1989, she got married, while she was still reeling from this original devastation.
That is where her problems began, because within the very short9 months she was married, it was clear he had a temper, and it took her almost 4 years to get a divorce, cost thousands and thousands as he fought for every ounce that he could get out of her, emptied their personal bank account, emptied the house of the furniture while she was at work (he had just graduated as an Engineer so hadn't established his own career yet), and then he went after her company.

But, that wasn't the hard part. It all came tumbling down with the full fury of a tsunami, when during all of this, running a company,watching her ex-fiancé with his new wife and daughter, the wife wanted her out of the company. So, the locks to her business were changed, her business credit cards were cut off, the husband had cut off all of the personal credit cards, and he tried to keep her away from her company.She had 2 men vying for her company at the same time.
So what did she do? Well after months of trying to determine what had he done to the company that he needed her to not discover, she found out it was $100,000 in debt in her name, and the company still owed over $200,000 in deliverable custom programming projects, most of which all the money had been collected, taken as personal wages,and no work had occurred. Now what - right? Well, here's what she did.She got a loan for $80,000 and bought him out. She brought in a partner,which has now been her husband for 15 years, and pulled that company out of bankruptcy, restored the credit, delivered all of the projects with no funding to pay for them, and started again. While he moved directly across the street, doing the same thing, and stole all of her staff.
So what is the moral of her story? It could be many things, but today,it is about knowing that no matter what you are facing today, around the corner is something completely new – and you just have to keep walking forward, and not looking back.
Tracy saw a way for anyone to make their way out, and has written a beginner’s step-by-step guide to help people put their plan together. She saw the overwhelm of information they were experiencing, the frustration of not knowing where to start, the sense of failure as desire didn't meet expectations, and knew there needed to be a step-by-step plan that created a blueprint and order of what needed to be done, and when - so that you can rocket ride your progress, stay focused,and have a direct path to internet profits.
Over 300 pages to implementing the Internet Marketing strategies you need to build a solid foundation and keep you moving closer to your dreams.
She wants you to succeed - so for my subscribers she is going to offer over $625 in free gifts, if you get it today. Here's a glimpse of those including a free coaching session:
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There is a way out. Together we'll make sure you get there.

One of the questions I get often is "How can I

write a book?". I think everyone has a story in

them that they want to share.

When I began writing my book, I knew very little

about publishers, editors, cover designers, interior

designers and printers. The process can be quite

overwhelming.

I started writing my book by simply opening up

a Microsoft word document and writing. Every evening I would

write after my kids were asleep. I then hired an editor to help me

edit the book, chapter by chapter.

Recently my good friend, Jess Kennedy Williams, author of

Heartbreak-Free Dating, created an amazing new book writing

program that helps you start writing your first book tonight.

Jess has done such great job simplifying the book writing process and providing invaluable resources every new author needs.

If you are thinking about writing your first book, Jess is giving away

a free 5 day mini-course with the steps that you need to begin writing your book right away. Go to: www.authorguru.com to sign up.

How wonderful it would be if everyone shared their life experiences and challenges to help and inspire others. Get your story told and impact the world!

Dear Friend,
I am celebrating the official launch of my book Seven Secrets to a Successful divorce in a big way.
My goal is to make Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce a NUMBER ONE BEST- SELLER on Amazon.com on Thursday, April 12, 2007 and with your help I can do it!
I wrote this book because I learned the hard way about divorce. I was a happily married mother of four when she caught my husband cheating and my life spiraled out of control. What followed were two years of hell. i went through it all, money problems, dealing with a deadbeat ex-husband, navigating the court system, corrupt lawyers and more.
Eventually my life got better. I made it through the storm. In my hard hitting, tell all book, I reveal the secrets to a successful divorce for women. I share the survival skills you must know to have a positive divorce outcome.
Because of my difficult divorce and my desire to help other women and children, I am donating 100% of the profits from Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce to The Child Support Disaster Relief Fund when you purchase the book on April 12th (which is also my birthday!) at amazon.com .
www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm
You will also receive over $700 in valuable gifts from some incredible well-known authors and businesses when you purchase the book. Just go to www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm to order Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce on April 12, 2007.
Imagine how good it will feel to help another human being go for a goal...a dream…go for what is in her heart and ATTAIN it!
You can feel good that 100% of the profits today from the sale of the book is going to help children who are suffering.
There are 17 million children in the U.S who do not receive child support. No hurricane, fire or flood devastates more children. With your help today, we can make a difference.
www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm
Thank you for making Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce a number ONE best-seller. Your effort to make this happen is appreciated more than you will ever know. May your kindness and willingness to help someone else be returned to you blessed and multiplied.

PS- please forward this email to your friends. Let's remember the single mothers today who are struggling to make ends meet and support their children. Non-payment of child support is an issuethat affects us all. Many women are forced to go on welfare or lose their homes. Today we can help.
www.secretsofdivorce.com/freebonuses.htm

Angry Deadbeat Dads Protest Pizza Place

The Deadbeat Dads are upset because a Ohio child

enforcement agency worked has put their pictures on pizza boxes at

three local pizzerias.

They decided to hold a protest outside one of the pizzerias this weekend.

Instead of complaining about how "unfair" it is that they have to pay support and that the court system is out to get them, why don't they use their time more wisely and go out and work so they can pay the support the owe? This way they won't have to worry about seeing themselves on a pizza box the next time they order pizza.

I am starting to get some emails from angry deadbeats myself. Here is one

I received today:

"Why do you people keep saying child support goes to the children? It goes to the custodial parent (mom) and she does whatever she wants with it. It's a blatant lie to describe it any other way. You are duplicitous and clueless about the realities of the system and it's effects on children. You care about mom not the children."

Here is my reply:

"I think the children need to come first, not the parents.
As a mother of four children whose ex-husband did not pay
child support for a year, I think I do know first hand how
devastating it is to the children. My ex left his family with no money,
a mortgage, credit card bills and household expenses.

The child support my ex now pays goes to feed my children and
that is about as far as it goes. I pay for all
clothing,activities, sports,camp ect.. Not to mention the roof over
the heads.

I do not know your situation. But did you know there are
also mothers who do not pay child support? There are much
more men, hence the term "deadbeat dads".

Most women who do not receive support for their kids
are struggling to take care of them.Do some women abuse
the system? Possibly, I have not personally encounter a
single mom who has used her children's support for herself, but
I am guessing that you may have. The majority are just trying to support
their kids in the best way that they can. It is hard to be a single
parent with sole financial responsibility for your children.

Thank you for writing. I hope your situation, whatever it may
be improves."

So what do you think? Do you agree with me that Deadbeat parents

should be displayed on pizza boxes?

Check out my Slide Show!

Pizza boxes deliver wanted posters of dead-beat dads
Associated Press
Last update: March 25, 2007 – 11:26 AM

CINCINNATI — Customers at some suburban pizza parlors are getting something extra with their pepperoni and mushrooms — wanted posters for parents accused of failing to pay child support.
The idea came to Cynthia Brown, executive director of the Butler County Child Enforcement Agency, while she was ordering pizza.
"It suddenly dawned on me that most people running from the law don't eat out, they order pizza," said Brown, whose county is north of Cincinnati.
Enforcement agencies across the country use a variety of methods to locate support scofflaws and collect past-due payments. Virginia has issued subpoenas to cellular phone companies seeking addresses and phone numbers. California's Kern County seizes and auctions parents' vehicles, with proceeds going to the children, said Kay Cullen, a spokeswoman for the National Child Support Enforcement Association.
State child support agencies collected more than $23 billion in child support for 17.2 million children in 2005, but the cumulative past-due child support since the agencies were first formed more than 30 years ago is $106 billion, Cullen said.
"While we have made progress, putting the wanted posters on pizza boxes is an example of the innovation and commitment that we need," she said.
Other Ohio counties put posters on their Web sites and work with local Crime Stoppers programs, and a few contract with companies that can track people through rental and cell phone records, according to the Ohio Child Support Directors Association. Some include fliers in water and sewer bills.
Butler County has printed posters with mug shots of its 10 most-wanted parents, placing them in post offices and other government buildings and sending them to Ohio's 87 other counties. The lineup, chosen by prosecutors, is changed twice a year.
The Butler County sheriff's office served 1,224 nonsupport warrants last year, said sheriff's Sgt. Todd Langmeyer. The county has about 350,000 residents.
Brown approached several restaurants and chains with her idea of affixing the posters to pizza boxes, but so far only three pizzerias are participating.
Since the first pizza posters appeared in August, they have led to one arrest, Langmeyer said. "It's a good idea any time you can put the faces out there," he said.
The owner of Karen's Pizzeria hasn't heard any complaints about her participation in the poster program.
"Some customers joke about it and say they're glad they aren't on it," Karen Willis said. "Most seem to think it's a good idea."
An attorney who focuses on fathers' rights cases called the tactic "horrible."
"It's just a way of shaming people," said Maury Beaulier, whose firm is in Eden Prairie, Minn.
Many circumstances can cause people to get behind in support payments, but that doesn't make them deadbeats, he said.
Widespread public shaming also can devastate the children, said Michael McCormick, executive director of the American Coalition for Fathers and Children.
"Think how children feel to see a parent on a wanted poster and know their friends might see it," he said.
Brown said her agency tries to work with parents by trying to help them find work and seeks most payments through civil court. Criminal charges are a last resort. Conviction on a felony count of failing to pay child support brings a prison sentence of up to 18 months, with fines usually set in the amount of the support owed.
"We aren't trying to penalize these people," Brown said. "We are just trying to help the kids who have a right to be supported."

I think this is a great idea! Some might be critical of it , but if you think non-payment of child support is not your problem, think again. Many families who do not receive child support are forced to go welfare.

There are 17 million children in the U.S. who are owed 107 BILLION in child support payments.

No hurricane, fire or flood leaves more children devastated. On April 12, 2007 I am donating 100% of the profits from my book "Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce" to The Child Support Disaster Relief Fund (A.C.E.S) on www.amazon.com

We all need to become aware of this problem and do what we can to help. Check out those pizza boxes!

I recently started a divorce support group in my area. Our first meeting was Thursday night and it was wonderful to meet other people whoare either getting a divorce or are already divorced.
I would like to invite those of you who live in the New Jersey area to join my group on Meetup.com.
http://divorcesupport.meetup.com/298
Meetup.com has divorce and single parent groups all across the world! Membership is free and it is a great way not only meet people in the same situation you are in, but be able to share your feelings with someone who has been there and understands.

Have you seen this?
Man Chainsaws House in Two for DivorceReutersBERLIN (March 9) - A 43-year-old German decided to settle his imminent divorceby chainsawing a family home in two and making off withhis half in a forklift truck.
Police in the eastern town of Sonneberg said on Fridaythe trained mason measured the single-storey summer house -- which was some 26 feetlong and 6 meters wide -- before chainsawing through the wooden roof and walls.
"The man said he was just taking his due,"said a police spokesman. "But I don't think his wife was too pleased."
After finishing the job, the man picked up his half with the forklift truck and drove to his brother's house where he has since been staying.

Well, I thought I had heard it all, but I guess not! Thankfully most of our divorces will not go this far.
This is a perfect example of how divorce can make even the saniest person go a little crazy.
So remember when your ex or soon to be exstart pushing your buttons, take a deep breath,count to 10, and think about the peaceful outcome you desire!

Five Simple Rules To Follow During An Ugly Divorce

Why does divorce turn ugly? What makes one partner turn on the other? I have often pondered these questions. It amazes me that two people who stood at the altar and vowed to be together until death do us part, can ultimately destroy each other.

While I was married the thought of a couple going through
a vicious divorce made no sense to me. I always thought that when a couple decided to divorce they should simply divide their assets in half and part ways amicably. There was never a reason for a bitter divorce, I naively thought.

I was stunned when during my own divorce my ex husband refused to settle and split our assets. What followed was a long, expensive legal battle. I never imagined that I would be engaged in the same kind of divorce I once scorned.
I decided to research why divorce becomes ugly. I found that one of the main causes of a bitter divorce is that one or both spouses are receiving bad advice. Sometimes this advice comes from an attorney. Other times it is from family members or friends.

But no matter who provided the advice, it is always received by an angry, vengeful spouse. This is the spouse who feels betrayed, who wants to hurt his or her mate. The spouse who cannot let go and move on with their life. This person has a need to get even. In the emotionally weak state one is left in during the wake of a divorce, he or she is easy prey for a greedy divorce attorney or a mother-in-law who hated her daughter-in –law from day one.
Are more men guilty of being unfair and using devious tactics in divorce than women? I think the playing field is about even. There are probably just as many women as men who resort to despicable behavior during divorce.

You may be tempted to act out and strike back at a spouse that is causing you pain. Remember that the more in control you are of your behaviors and actions, the better you will come out in the end. You are being provided with an inside view of what some men are capable of during divorce. Some of this information is shocking and startling.
You may think that your ex would never do this to you. Hopefully he or she won’t. But you need to be on guard and prepared for battle at all times.

The woman who have already suffered at the hands of a husband who has played dirty tricks will tell you they never saw it coming. Never in a millions years did they believe their husbands could be capable of such actions. Yet it still happened to them. Be forewarned, armed and ready.

5 Simple Rules To Follow During A Ugly Divorce:

1. Watch who you confide in. You must be careful of who you tell your divorce woes to. someone who you consider a friend may pass information either knowingly or unknowingly to your spouse.

2. Do not try and reason with your spouse. Let your lawyer do the talking for you. That is why you hired him. Engaging in conversations with your husband about your divorce can make things a lot worse. He may be setting you up. You cannot trust him. If you could then your divorce would be settled by a mediator.

3. Be prepared financially. Make sure you have the funds available to pay for your attorney’s retainer fee and support you and your children. In my book “Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know” I go into great detail explaining what you need to do to protect yourself financially.

4. Always control your emotions! Any out of control behavior
will cost you in the courtroom. You better believe that your
husband will be making a list of anything you do that is questionable.
Are you driving by his home? Calling his cell phone?
Harassing him by email? Your husband will use these kinds
of behaviors to portray you as a unfit mother,
crazy woman etc.


5. Be proactive and be involved in your divorce process. You cannot depend on your divorce attorney to win your divorce for you no matter how much you are paying him. Your lawyer cares about his fee. This is his business, how he makes a living. He is not your best friend, or confidante. What you can expect from him is to represent you to the best of his abilities. You need to become involved and stay in control of what goes on in your case.

I hope the information I have given you will help you prepare for your divorce so that you may have the best possible divorce outcome!

SEVEN SIGNS OF A CHEATING HUSBAND
1. Is your husband suddenly paying more attention to his appearance? Is he wearing new clothes, using cologne, and making sure his hair is combed? If this is not his normal behavior then this is a huge sign your husband is having an affair.
2. He is critical of you and has been picking fights lately. This is another big sign.
My ex was very cranky around the time he was cheating. I couldn’t understand why he was so angry at me. I remember one night he got dressed, put on his shoes, and brushed his teeth. I thought it was odd because it was late and it looked liked he was going somewhere. Instead he sat on the couch. As I was finishing something on the computer, he yelled, “So you’re not going to spend any time with me? Fine, I am going to my friend’s house,” and he got up and left. I realized later that he was purposely picking a fight with me so he would have an excuse to leave the house. His “friend,” of course, was his lover!
3. Watch out if your ex is suddenly too nice to you. If this not his normal behavior then he could be feeling very guilty and trying to assuage his pangs of guilt.
4. He doesn’t want you using his cell phone. This is how my divorce began. My ex twisted my arm when I wouldn’t give him back his cell phone. He knew of course that I would discover the calls to his lover. Ask your husband if you can use his cell. See his reaction.
5. Is he staying up late surfing the Web till the wee hours of the night? He may be having cybersex, looking at pornography, or instant-messaging his lover. If you are computer savvy, you can check your computer and find out where your husband has been on the Internet. There are also programs you can install on your computer to monitor activity and find out what is really going on.
6. Does your husband have a newfound interest in hanging out with the guys? Did he just start a new hobby or join the gym? Is he gone certain evenings of the week? You may want to discreetly follow him one evening and see where he is really going. My ex started hanging out with one of his buddies several times a week. This was the same guy he would go out with maybe once every few months. It became obvious later that the “buddy” was his girlfriend.
7. Is he no longer interested in having sex with you? Was he always wanting to be with you in the past but now has lost interest? This is another huge sign. Sometimes though it can be the opposite, the guilty husband syndrome. He may want to be intimate with you even though he is getting it somewhere else too! I coached a woman who found out that her husband was cheating the morning after he made love to her. Apparently he had been intimate with his mistress the day before too!

The Divorce Blame Game

We all begin the divorce process convinced that everything is the other spouse’s fault. All of the pain is a direct result of their bad behavior. Your ex is acting in complete disregard for your feelings. If your ex would only behave the divorce would go more smoothly. That you might have a part in this mess doesn’t even occur to you. No, your spouse is to blame. He is one who cheated, lied, and betrayed you. How could you be responsible?But when the dust settles you may start asking yourself some difficult questions. Was it really all your ex’s fault? Was there anything you might have done or not done that could have contributed to this divorce?

This is where it gets tough. No one likes to think that they were responsible in any way for the failure of their marriage. It just has to be your ex’s fault. Don’t you have that long list of sins? How could anyone draw a different conclusion?Chances are that in most ways you are right, and your ex is wrong. Some of his actions might seem unforgivable. So, after all of the stress, heartache, and pain, why bother to accept any blame?If you look inward instead of outward, you will be able to take control. With this power you will emerge from your divorce with greater insight, and valuable lessons for any future relationship.

Only a victim looks at an ex-spouse and says: “Because of you I do not trust anyone. Because of you my life is empty. Because of you I am in pain.” In doing that, the victim gives her ex-husband a controlling power over her behavior. You are making your ex responsible for your life. In saying: “It’s not my fault,” you are holding yourself back from the hard work of recovery. The longer you harbor this victim mentality, the longer you will deny yourself a chance at the life you deserve to live.Don’t hide from yourself. Dig deep into the memory of your past actions. Look at them, learn from them, and let them go. Forgive yourself. Until you do that you won’t find forgiveness for anyone. Once you do it you might be pleasantly surprised that the anger you feel for your spouse is diminishing.The willingness to let go of the past, and truly move on to a better place, is the key to peace and happiness.

Christina Rowe is the author of the new book Seven Secrets To A Successful Divorce-What Every Woman Needs To Know . Find out the survival skills that will save you time, money and heartache during your divorce.For a free chapter of the book go to : http://www.secretsofdivorce.com

How To Deal With Your Ex-Husband’s New Girlfriend

Many of us find a new mate immediately after divorce. Your ex-husband may be one of them. This can be hard on you emotionally. My own ex took no break whatsoever. His relationship was the cause of our breakup. She moved in with him two months after he left my home. She left him after little more than a year. I was elated.Her departure was satisfying on several levels. My feelings stemmed from my own hurt, and they also came from the disruption and pain she’d brought to my children’s lives. But I admit that revenge was a factor. I liked the feeling that my ex was finally getting his comeuppance. Now he would feel the sting of rejection. I wanted him to suffer this. I had good reason. He had thrown out 13 years of marriage, and I wanted him to pay for it.His girlfriend had been a painful reminder of all that, and I couldn’t help but feel relief that her life no longer intersected with mine or my children’s.But these feelings of relief and satisfaction were quickly tempered by the fact that he soon found another girlfriend. I decided that any woman was better than the last, but still I wondered, how could anyone want to date a broke, often-unemployed, overweight, balding man?His new girlfriend was only 24, 14 years younger than he was. She seemed nice enough, but deep down it still bothered me that he was happy. Despite all the books I had read on spirituality, forgiveness, and love, I still felt rage.Try as I might, I couldn’t understand these feelings. I no longer had any physical attraction to this man. I didn’t even like him. Why would I care? The real reason was that I wanted him to suffer for what he had done to me.It is normal to have confusing feelings long after the divorce is final. An ex’s new partner can stir hostility whenever she comes in contact with your children. This is inevitable. Your life has been turned upside down. The familiar and routine are changed forever. Even if your marriage was filled with anger, it was still the life you knew. Some inmates find security in a prison cell. Marriage can be the same.With divorce new people enter your life, some not by choice. You must find a way to deal with your ex’s new love. This is difficult if you are not currently in a relationship yourself. Why him, but not me? You ask over and over.You feel you are a good person, and you deserve love. You feel as if your ex deserves loneliness and pain. Stop taking it personally. The right person will show up. Though it may not seem so now, he will arrive at exactly the right moment. Be cautious. Look before you leap. There’s no need to risk repeating a painful experience. Take your ex’s success as an omen. You know that if it can happen to him quickly, you too will find love. If his new love proves fleeting, don’t rejoice or worry about it. The longer you wait the better chance you have for a truly lasting love.Don’t jump into something just to prove yourself. This is not a competition. This is a serious search for a love that will last a lifetime. You do not need to suffer again.That doesn’t mean you should ignore your negative emotions. Release them. Talk to a friend or therapist. Punch a pillow. Wait until you are alone, then call your ex every dirty name in the book. Shout it and scream it. Let all of it go. Let go of all of the pain, hurt, and betrayal. The process may take months, or even years, but you will feel better in time.That special someone will come, and your divorce will fade into memory. You will no longer harbor hateful feelings toward your ex. You will come to accept your ex for who he is and wish him well.

Christina Rowe is the author of the new book "Seven Secrets To A Successful Divorce-What Every Woman Needs To Know". Find out the survival skills that will save you time, money and heartache during your divorce.

Get your FREE chapter of Seven Secrets to a Successful divorce

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or go to: http://www.secretsofdivorce.com

The Key to Winning in Divorce Court

The rule to remember is: Anticipate and prepare. Think about what your opponent (your spouse) wants, and what he or she will do to get it. Consider their possible defenses and offenses, and then do your homework. Find information to counter what they have to say. Look on the Internet, go to the library, and find magazines and books. When you fight back you need to always back yourself up with proof. Anybody can say anything, but having facts in print is imperative.All of this must be in the context of the law, and the law can be a brutal thing. The first time you enter a court you may feel overwhelmed. The judge’s rulings may seem unfair to the point of being ridiculous. Here is an example: your ex isn’t paying any child support and you receive a shutoff notice for the electricity in midwinter. You don’t have a court date for another three weeks. Your attorney informs you that you must wait until your court date to get any help. Emergency orders are rarely granted. So your electricity can be shut off while you wait for your court date. You wait, hoping they won’t shut it off before the court date. Then, with two days to go, your lawyer calls. Your court date has been postponed! This happens all the time. The calendars of family courts are always overcrowded. You may sit waiting through a whole day, paying your lawyer more with each hour that passes, only to be told that your case has been delayed for two weeks.Your lawyer will know these things, but don’t rely too completely on that. A good lawyer is an expert, but a lawyer is also your representative and your advisor. He or she is there to convey your case to the court. To do the job well a lawyer must know exactly what you are after. But you must have some knowledge of the law as well. Only then can you ask the right questions, and make informed choices when the lawyer presents you with options and decisions. It’s essential for you to learn as much as you can about the family laws in your state. These are the laws governing marriage, children, common assets, and divorce.Every day women suffer travesties of injustice in courtrooms. It is a bruising process. Realize that from the start. Form a thick skin. If you don’t, you will be constantly frustrated and upset. I shed many a tear from frustration as my husband walked away without paying our children a dime. At each juncture I returned to a home where every responsibility was mine. I still thank God I had a family that helped me through those dark days. I often think of the women who do not have such support, and wonder how they manage.Once again, the rule is: Anticipate and prepare. If you realize the road will be a long and hard one, you can anticipate the difficulties, and prepare with the support of your family.
About the Author:Christina Rowe is the author of the new book "Seven Secrets To A Successful Divorce-What Every Woman Needs To Know". Find out the survival skills that will save you time, money and heartache during your divorce.For a FREE chapter of "Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce" go to http://www.secretsofdivorce.com

How to Escape an Abusive Husband
There are many important things you should do if you are an abuse victim preparing to leave your spouse. These include: making copies of important records, papers, and bills; putting these records, some cash, and extra clothes in a safe place or a trusted friend’s house; and leaving when you must. If you can, start your own bank account. Get credit cards in your own name.
If the threat of physical violence is imminent escape with your children as soon as you can.
In such a situation, have an escape plan. Figure out what room in your house is most secure, and has a reasonable exit to the outside. Be prepared to give in to verbal demands in order to buy time. Once you have determined that the moment has come, go immediately. If you see a dangerous situation arising, do whatever you must (short of increasing the physical danger to yourself or your children) to create an opportunity for escape.
Once you are away from the home, go to the nearest shelter, or to the home of someone you trust. Also consider whether your spouse will follow, and if so, where he is likely to look.
Using the Legal System to Escape an Abuser
As I noted above, often a divorce action provokes an abuser. His violence may escalate. Protective or restraining orders can help, but they can also further infuriate the abusive spouse. Law enforcement can’t protect a victim or children around the clock. This is something you should discuss with your attorney.
Remember, when you ask for a protective or restraining order against your spouse, the judge will want as much evidence as possible. Document erratic behavior and any violent actions starting now. You can do this by writing everything down, or keeping a computer file, but be sure it is safe from discovery. Try to recall each detail. Ideally such records should be moved to wherever you are keeping your important papers in case of escape. One way to keep things written down, and retrievable from anywhere, is web based email, such as yahoo or hotmail, as long as you make sure the password is secure, and that you log off whenever you are finished. You can write things and save them as a draft, and there is no risk of losing the hard drive if you have to leave in a hurry. Call others as soon as possible after an incident, and have them keep a record of it. If you have bruises, show them to others, and ask them to make a written note of what they’ve seen. Keep the paperwork on hospital visits. If you have made any 911 calls, get the tapes of them. Your attorney will need as much evidence as possible.
If you are representing yourself in a motion for a restraining order, and you have such proof, let the evidence speak for itself. There is nothing wrong with expressing your fears, but do not say more than you have to against your spouse. If there are witnesses to violence, and/or solid physical evidence (cuts, bruises, broken items), these will be the most convincing factors. Most judges will be impressed more by a victim who simply states the need for protection and then presents compelling evidence. If you have a lawyer, but still have to testify, do so without anger. Present yourself as a victim of deranged behavior, and in need of a sane, sensible solution. Concentrate on the violence of the abuse, rather than on the abuser.
Judges seek to be referees in divorce disputes, not favoring either side. A judge will often resent being manipulated into issuing a restraining order early in the proceedings, especially if the victim later uses it as evidence in the divorce trial. Show that your concerns are only for the safety of yourself and those around you. Demonstrate that the order will be a useful tool in cooling things down and producing a just settlement.
Another issue that will concern a judge is the children. Judges are prone to try to sustain contact between parents and children. If your children are subject to abuse, then any protective or restraining order should apply to them. If the abuse is not aimed at them, and you intend to allow your spouse any contact with the children, discuss this with your lawyer. Often a restraining order can be limited in a way that is designed to defuse the anger of the abuser.
There are also other options to protective and restraining orders. In most states, a party in a divorce action can ask that a no-contact order be a condition of the divorce proceedings. However, these usually expire with the final decree.
Settlements
The extent of abuse, and the potential for further abuse, should be the most important factors in any settlement. If there is an obvious threat of further abuse to a spouse and/or children, the contact should be limited or completely cut off. The safety of the victims must be the basis for settlement.
If the abuse is confined to the spouse, and isn’t sustained or life threatening, a judge will often arrange for visitation rights with the children. If this is the case, make sure all conditions are met to ensure your own safety when exchanging children for a visit. Judges sometimes draw up conditions for these exchanges that include third parties (trusted friends or family members), performing the exchange in a public place, or other security measures.
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Deciding to Divorce

The most intense, heart-wrenching decision comes at the start: Should you get divorced? Much has led up to this question, including the notions of separation and divorce. Up to now they have only been thoughts and words, with no immediate consequences. Now that you realize the time to decide has come, you have to contemplate action. The focus on action clarifies the situation, but also makes it seem more difficult and scary.
Any number of scenarios might lead to the end of a marriage. Sometimes there’s no choice; it’s your spouse who crosses the line. Often an affair ends a marriage. Other times physical abuse occurs, and the marriage becomes dangerous and intolerable. Circumstances like these leave little choice in the matter. A divorce becomes the only acceptable step.
But many divorces arise out of situations that are far less cut-and-dried. You may find that your marriage has grown dull. You look at your mate and realize that all the physical attraction you felt is gone. Or maybe the emptiness is in a different area. You might feel restricted, and even suffocated in everything you do. Your soul mate is no longer your soul mate. Your lives have grown apart. In situations like these others may still see your marriage as ideal, but deep down you feel it is all pain and misery. This may be one-sided. One partner may think everything is fine, while the other only wants out. Or you may be gasping for breath, and not even knowing it. If you come to the realization that your marriage is failing, should you get a divorce?
Before you take any steps you should contemplate where they might lead. Divorce is a painful, difficult choice. Ending a marriage is almost never easy, even when both sides agree that they no longer love each other. When one spouse still has deep feeling and the other doesn’t, or when there is any sense of imbalance at all—whether it be emotional, financial, or professional—that can only make it worse. In most cases you are ending a long relationship. There was love here once, and intensity. You are considering cutting the cord with someone who was the most important person in your life.
The presence of children amplifies the problem. The younger the kids, the worse it can be. Most children cannot help but feel torn when parents separate.
Divorce is often a financial earthquake for both parties. The family home might be sold. Two households are set up, both having to accommodate the children. Unless both parties are rich, this will affect your family’s standard of living.
Whether the problem is mental, spiritual, or a combination of factors, divorce is a step you should examine carefully. If there is no physical abuse in the picture, you may want to go to couple’s counseling before making the final decision. Offer to go with your spouse to see a therapist. Put it in positive terms, and make it a wholehearted offer. If you don’t think of it this way, counseling will have little chance of having any value. Your spouse may say no, but you will have tried.
If there is abuse, either physical or mental, couple’s counseling is almost certainly not the right course. Spousal or child abuse should not be tolerated. If it happens you need to protect yourself. In such a case you should simply look for the quickest, safest way out. Appeal to friends and family or, if necessary, go to a shelter. Do whatever you must do to effectively separate yourself and your children from your spouse, then look for a lawyer.
Has your spouse cheated? For me this was the cause of my divorce. Some will be able to forgive their spouse and try to save the marriage. I was unable to accept my husband’s affair and he quickly changed into a different person, both emotionally and physically, leaving me no choice but to file for divorce.
I know from my own experience, and from observation of many divorces, that your road ahead is long, frustrating, and probably ugly. The best scenario would be that you and your spouse begin by meeting with a mediator to agree on a fair settlement. If this route is possible it will save both of you thousands in legal fees. If you feel that your spouse will agree to an amicable divorce, this is the way to go.

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Are you considering divorce? I’m talking about quiet, sober consideration of a question, not the thoughts that flare up from the heated emotions that come right after an argument. Have you thought through the effects of a divorce, and come to the conclusion that you may want to act? If you have, there are things you should do right away.
If your spouse has already filed before you, then you must act immediately. If not, you should take certain actions quickly, but not carelessly. The things you do now will affect every decision throughout the process, right down to the final decree.
If you have reached the point where divorce is a clear option, and particularly if you are considering an action that shows you mean to separate from your spouse (if you are thinking of leaving, or asking him/her to move out), you should do the following before approaching your spouse:
Seven things you must do before approaching your spouse about divorce
Make copies of your spouse’s pay stubs for the past eight weeks.
Make copies of your joint tax returns for the past five years.
Copy all bank statements and documentation of stock accounts, IRAs, and pension plans.
Make copies of all of your monthly bills over the past three months. These should include mortgage statements, rent payments, utility bills, car payments, insurance premiums, children’s expenses, medical expenses, and credit card statements.
Copy deeds to any properties owned jointly or in your spouse’s name.
Copy documents relating to any investments. These should include stocks, bonds, real estate, and any corporations or businesses owned in any part by you and your spouse.
Make a list of all collectibles, jewelry and other valuables. Photograph or videotape these items. Also list all furnishings and take pictures of these also
This may seem like an overwhelming task, but doing it will ensure that you have all the information ready when you need it most. Once you leave, or if your spouse leaves and takes these records, then you may have to ask your attorney to file a motion to force your spouse to produce them. That would become just another costly hassle down the line. Avoid it. Make copies.
Why do you need all these documents? If divorce proceedings get into a courtroom it means you and your spouse are in a battle. What are at stake are almost certainly income, lifestyle, and assets. You and your spouse are sorting out all of these things in a courtroom, so you need to establish the cost of living and the lifestyle you and your family enjoyed while married. This becomes the baseline the court will use for a settlement. The judge will base decisions about child support and alimony on this information. You must show what your family spends on maintaining a home, food, clothing, transportation, health, education, and any other necessities. In addition you need to clearly establish what your spouse earns or is capable of earning.
If you exit your home empty-handed, or if your spouse walks off with these records, you have no proof. In theory, the Court can force your spouse might produce these records, but only if your spouse is honest in producing the necessary documents, and only at the cost of one more bill from your attorney. That bill will probably come when you can least afford it. And if your spouse swears that the records produced are the only records in existence, you may be stuck with that answer. Once again: Make copies. Give them to a trusted friend or relative before informing your spouse you want a divorce.

“With Christina Rowe’s help and coaching I was able to find a great attorney. I am now able to provide my children with the financial security that they deserve. This book is a must read for any woman going through a divorce”

Cindy, mother of two

“When my ex-husband refused to pay medical expenses for our children, I was able to bring him back to court without paying a lawyer. After reading Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know I was successful in court and saved myself a lot of money in attorney fees”

Sophia Demeson, mother of three

“How I wish I had read this book 5 years ago! I suffered through a long, painful divorce. If the information in this book was available to me back then I would have saved myself money, time and heartache”

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“I am currently going through a complicated divorce. I now know how to protect myself financially thanks to this book. If you are going through a divorce I highly recommend you read Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know by Christina Rowe. It is a lifesaver”


Christine Vela



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This online newsletter will keep you updated and informed on the latest divorce strategies. I will be consulting with top notch experts in legal, parenting, financial and other related fields. I will bring you the very best tips and techniques you need for a successful divorce!

Hello,

My name is Christina Rowe and I am the author of the upcoming book Seven Secrets to a Successful Divorce-what every woman needs to know. I learned the hard way about the perils of divorce. I was a happily married woman with four children. Then I caught my husband cheating and my life spiraled out of control. What followed were two years of hell. I went through it all: money problems,dealing with a deadbeat ex-husband,navigating the court system,corrupt lawyers and more.
Eventually my life got better. I made it through the storm. In my hard hitting, tell-all book I share with you the secrets to a successful divorce for women. I share my story and give you specific tips and recommendations on how not to be taken advantage of during your own divorce process. I will teach you down to earth survival skills that will save you time, money and heartache during your divorce. I would like to share some of those tips here and would love to hear about your own divorce and how I can help you!